Wagons East

I thought somebody might notice that the "POMERGE" license plate has changed from being a Manitoba plate into an Ontario one, and ask about it, but alas...

I'll cut to the chase: We're moving to the Toronto area in just under three weeks. I've accepted a ministry job there, but I didn't mention it here until after I got a chance to let the band know (which I did last Sunday).

What could possibly make me give up a great band, a cool home group, and life in the beautiful city of Winnipeg?

Basically, I feel that this position will put me in a place of making a difference. I'll be part of a team of youth ministry people who share similar journeys and visions for what the church could be, and I'll be in a place where I can actually help set the culture for youth ministry for an entire denomination. I've always believed, ever since this blog started (cf. Robbymac's Journey), that "we're far more dangerous as Reformers than we are as Protesters." This is my opportunity to put my money where my mouth is.

But DANG! I'm going to miss the band, our home group, and the many friends we have here.



(Missing from home group photo: Steve, Matt, Calina, Edith, Kyle & Trevor)

Festival Season is upon us

This was taken yesterday at The Forks in Winnipeg (so named because the city was originally built around the junction of three rivers), where we were part of the "Ban Landmines" benefit concert for Amnesty International. Now that the weather is really hot, we're doing lots of outdoor festivals and smaller shows like this one.

Winnipeg's Folklorama, the largest multi-cultural festival in North America, starts in just a week, now that the Fringe Festival is over. We'll be part of the opening ceremonies on Scotia Bank Stage on July 31, where we share the stage with Colin Hay (former lead singer of Men At Work), and we'll be the house band for a week at the Celtic Ireland Pavillion. If you're around locally for the week of August 8-14, stop by any night for a great time.

It'll be a fitting swan song for our time in Winnipeg, methinks.

Jargonese

Maggi Dawn recently lamented that blogs require brevity (generally speaking) and sometimes she wishes we'd feel free to write longer pieces instead of blog-bytes.

Justin Baeder issued an invitation to post various "insider terms" that might be obscure to those outside the church (or denomination) but that get used frequently by, well, insiders. It got me thinking about how "insider" language, or jargon, can be both a good & bad thing.

So, in honour of Maggi, here's a somewhat longer post, which addresses a possible outcome of insider language (jargonese), and will demonstrate to Karl that I, too, make use of humour on my blog...

The "Evangelical Put-Down" Game Show!

(Enthusiastic applause)

"Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to another half hour edition of "Evangelical Put Down"! The show where you can gain points and prizes for coming up with a creative, catchy way of putting non-Christians in their place with a simple expression! And now, here’s the host of "Evangelical Put Down", Anne Noying!"

(Wildly enthusiastic cheers)

Anne: Thanks everyone, and welcome to our show. Tonight our contestants will once again try to come up with a catchy way of putting non-Christians in their place. But remember, not only must this catchy phrase please the Christian doctrinal content quotient, it must also leave the non-Christian confused! Ready? Here's our pagan, and more important, here's our first contestant!
(Applause)

Pagan: Uh, hey, man, how about doing some drugs after school?

Contestant #1: No way! Why do you think they call it 'dope'? (Scattered applause from Christian audience)

Anne: Oh, no, I'm sorry, Contestant #1, but that’s just not the quality we're looking for. The expression has already been done, by secular sources (murmurs of disapproval from Christians), and it makes too much sense to the pagan. Let's bring out Contestant #2! (More applause)

Pagan: Uh, I really believe that we all evolved from lesser life forms. I think evolution explains man's origins.

Contestant #2: Hey, if you want to think your grandpa was a monkey, that's your privilege! (Wild applause from Christian audience)

Anne: Wow! Snappy comeback, Contestant #2! You really answered that pagan on the issue of evolution! He looks properly confused! And the Christians love the put down! Uh-oh, wait a minute...

I'm sorry, Contestant #2, but our panel of judges say that you won't gain doctrinal content points unless you throw in some Scripture somewhere. But a good effort, nonetheless! Let’s bring out Contestant #3! (More applause)

Pagan: Wait, lemme get a good one...

Anne: Hurry up, you dumb reprobate, we haven't got all day! (Boos from Christians)

Pagan: Uh, oh, I've got one! Hey, ya Jesus Freak, I think you're just a victim of brainwashing! Ya can't be intelligent and Christian at the same time!

Contestant #3: Well, I may be a Jesus freak, but then, who's freak are you?

Pagan: Huh? (Wild applause and cheers from Christians)

Anne: Whoa! What a great put down! Ladies and gentlemen, did you hear it? Pithy. Direct. Spiritual! Yes, and it looks like our judges are favourably impressed. Yes, the answer has adequate spiritual content, it confused the pagan completely, and it was a big hit with the other Christians present! We have a winner! Congratulations, Contestant #3!

Contestant #3: Aw, shucks, 'tweren't nothing!

Anne: I bet you have a great time relating your faith to those around you with a sharp mind like yours!

Contestant #3: Yep, witnessing is my business!

Anne: Well, that's about all the time we have for today. Make sure you join us tomorrow for another edition of "Evangelical Put Down"! (Wild applause and fade...)

How quickly things change

I had the privilege of returning to Winnipeg Centre Vineyard this past Sunday; the last time I was there was at the building dedication weekend in 2003, because I wanted to stop by and cheer them on as they pursued their vision for the poor in the North End (well, and David Ruis was back in town for the celebration, and it's always a treat to hang with the Dave...).

This past Sunday, two friends of mine from Regina were in town (see post from June 8, 2004: "Mysterious Ways" for the back story), and had been asked by Nathan to share their stories with the whole congregation in leiu of a sermon -- very cool time to hear them speak. Jason Parks called me the night before to ask me to bring my Stratocaster to play lead guitar with the worship team; THAT was a whole lot of fun!

(By using the word "fun" in describing my involvement in a worship team, please don't assume that I'm not also very cognizant of the fact that I'm helping to lead a whole congegation to worship their Creator. It's just that it's fun, as well!)

I always enjoy an opportunity to visit different churches and see/hear what God is up to these days -- what was kinda bizarre is that I only recognized about 20% of the congegation at the Vineyard, and we've only been gone for two and a half years. Wow.

Still, it was a treat to visit again, to watch several of the women descend on Wendy to pray over her and encourage her, to see my two friends from Regina share their stories, and to take part in the worship team once again. Ya gotta like this big gianormous thing called "the Body"!

Stop me if you've heard this one...

How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?

Pentecostals/charismatics/Vineyard: Ten. One to change the bulb, and nine to pray against the spirit of darkness.

Presbyterians: None. Lights will go on and off at predestined times.

Roman Catholics: None. Candles only.

Episcopalians: Eight. One to call the electritian, and seven to say how much they like the old one better.

Baptists: At least fifteen. One to change the bulb, and three comittees to approve the change and decide who brings the potato salad.

Mormons: Five. One man to change the bulb, and four wives to tell him how to do it.

Unitarians: We choose not to make a statement either in favour of or against the need of a light bulb. However, if in your journey, you have found that light bulbs work for you, that is fine. You are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your personal relationship with your light bulb, and present it next month at our annual light bulb service in which we will explore the number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, fluorescent, three-way, long-life, and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence.

Methodists: Undetermined. Whether your light is bright, dull, or completely out, you are loved - you can be a light bulb, turnip bulb, or tulip bulb. Church lighting service is planned for Sunday, Jan. 5th. Bring bulb of your choice and a covered dish.

Nazerene: Six. One woman to replace the bulb while five men review the church lighting policy.

Lutherans: None. Lutherans don't believe in change.

Amish: What's a light bulb?

Feel free to add any further denominations and definitions that I might have missed!

Computer Haiku's you'll never see on a Mac

Windows NT crashed.
I am the Blue Screen of Death.
No one hears your screams.

Yesterday it worked.
Today it is not working.
Windows is like that.

A crash reduces
Your expensive computer
To a simple stone.

Sometimes, I'll admit, we Mac users can be a little smug. Please be patient with us, it's just that -- deep down -- we know that our computers are simply superior to PC's.

The least of these...

Now that I'm safe and sound back home in Winnipeg, I can return my attention to the blog...

James Mills, a self-described 'ecclesial dreamer' from Colorado, recently wrote a thought-provoking piece (July 8: 'Opening the Friendship Circle...') on whether or not some emerging groups might actually look more like exclusive cliques instead of the Body of Christ (my interpretation of his words; I'm not sure he would've used "clique"). His basic premise was that the glue that seems to hold some emergent gatherings together was that they consisted of people who were already friends and had many things in common -- in other words, there was a basic 'same-ness' to the members of the group, with little variation or variety.

Newcomers into such an ethos have a difficult time breaking into the existing group; in fact, in some groups, they simply don't try and drift off, and nobody seems to notice because at least the 'core members' are still together.

Karl Thienes, in his response to some things that Justin Baeder wrote, commented on his blog that:

"There is a closeness, a deep connection that is made when there is a common purpose--it is in sharing in the same worship, the same way of life, the same prayers, etc that we *truly* form the foundation any true friendship requires."

To me, these two themes are speaking to the same question, namely, are emerging groups about creating a safe place for enjoying already existing friendships, or are they about creating the kind of shared experiences that provide the ecclesiastical soil where deep, spiritual friendships can grow and flourish?

In other words, have our existing relationships become idols, or are we continually 'widening our tents' to make room for those who are different from us, who disrupt our nice little pomergent gatherings with their lack of 'sameness' to us, and who will probably change the dynamic of our groups -- permanently. Are we willing to pour ourselves out for the least and the last?

James Mills received a very strongly worded comment from a friend of his, saying "where the @#$% is my church"? When I read his friend's comments, I thought of some friends of ours here in Winnipeg, whose emailed thoughts are reflected in the following image (personal details have been omitted for privacy, and the girl in the picture is not the girl who sent me the email). They are representative of many people that I know who do not attend anything resembling 'institutional church' or 'emergent house group' after bad experiences in both. It is for the sakes of these hurting people that we need to give some careful thought to the question I wrote in bold letters above.

Where am I?

The correct answer today is "Toronto".

Together with the band, I was in Regina on Canada Day, followed by two days in Calgary, and a final stop at Dauphin Country Fest (we were on the "alternative" stage) before returning to Winnipeg. Four concerts, three cities, and 1700 miles of driving in four days, in weather of biblical purportions.

I did laundry when I got home, then re-packed my Labatt Blue gym bag, and we flew to Toronto to visit family & friends at 7:00AM the next day.

See? I'm not blogging but I'm not a blog-slacker, just busy trying to sort out which guitar to play and what time zone I'm playing in...